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    "And, boy, he went hog wild!"

    **PROJECT RUNWAY SPOILER: In today's post, I feature photos of the Bryant Park shows of the designers - don't look below if you don't want to see the final designs before tonight's show!**

    For you newcomers to the Hive, I write tv reviews every week on my tv blog: TiVo Junkie!

    Project Runway - Finale Part 1
    OMG, the Finale of Project Runway is tonight!! Holy crap balls, this season went quickly! Let's get prepped by reviewing last week's show and discussing how much we hate Kenley the pros/cons of each designer.

    After last week's totally predictable shocking decision to keep all four designers, they were given $8000 to create a line for Bryant Park. But, surprise! There's more! They have to design a wedding gown too and it's the wedding gown that will make or break their path to the tents. Oh wait! Surprise again! Even though you already have to design an entire line AND a wedding gown, um, can you make us a bridesmaid dress too? Kthxbai.

    The super lovable Tim Gunn drives his Saturn cross country (yeah, right) to visit the designers at home while they work on their designs:


    Korto's designs get rave reviews from Tim, except for when in came to one particular dress' shape: Korto definitely wins the Best Tim Gunn Comment Contest: "It gets a little sexual. I don't want a snatch shot." Korto's designs are so ridiculously cute and wearable, it will pretty much drive me insane if she doesn't win. She has a pretty cohesive line with the textures and colors she uses and you can definitely feel that ethnic vibe she was going for. Everything is so classic and sophisticated; I would love to purchase a Korto design.

    Her wedding dress, however, left much to be desired! When Tim visited her at home in Arkansas, it looked totally cool, but all that added boogaloo to the chestal (is so a word!) region in not pretty or flattering! The totally silhouette is so dumpy.

    I think her bridesmaid dress was really underrated by the judges. Sure, it's so short you can practically see the model's babyhole, but I thought that it matched the gown (in a good way) and wasn't too competing. Hrmph.


    On Tim's visit to Portland (go Pacific Northwest! Woot! Woot!), they went on a tandem bike ride! You heard me. A tandem bike ride! Just when you think Tim can't top the "snatch shot", he dons a bike helmet! We also learn, upon Tim's arrival, that Leanne has a boyfriend who is just as homely and dowdy as she is. Seriously, Leanne. Would it hurt you to do your hair once while you are being featured on national television?! I'm sure the Treseme Hair Salon would gladly donated a brush and a curling iron to your cause. Okay, back to the fashion. Leanne's collection is by far the most cohesive. I also fear that it might be too cohesive? The color combinations are great and I love how structured yet nature-inspired everything is. I still can't wait to see the wave-skirts move on the runway.

    Like her entire collection, the gown and bridesmaid dress compliment each other perfectly! I felt like Leanne's designs for last week's runway were the only ones that really complimented each other, didn't compete with each other, but you could see the theme there without it being overwhelming. Loving Leanne!

    Alrighty then. I should warn you now, if you are a Kenley fan, you are not welcome here! First of all, when Tim visits her in Brooklyn, she immediately starts being Kenley. Have you noticed that she never says "thank you" after a compliment? She always says "I know!" Uhg. How irritating! And then when she starts describing her Alice in Wonderland inspiration, Tim has to pretty much say "Yeah, I know the 'painting the roses reference, Kenley.' I'm not mentally retarded, you know!" I wonder if Tim Gunn is totally over Kenley by now. I know I would be. And I can't help but notice that Tim did all these extra-curricular activities with all the other designers but with Kenley he was in, told her what she wanted to hear, and was out like trout.

    Kenley's designs for Bryant Park are (1) completely predictable, (2) not at all cohesive and (3) most importantly, ugly as poo. What the fuck is up with her disgusting grandma prints that she uses? And then the ropes around the neck? Nice. And, I'm sorry, but does she not look like she's having a stroke in this picture?

    I could not handle that Kenley didn't get ripped open about how predictable and uncreative her wedding gown and bridesmaid dress were! Hi, if any one has seen Sex and the City, a feathery cocktail length dress is anything but creative. And seriously? A bubble skirt bridesmaid dress. Seen it! Sure, the judges mentioned the similarity between the wedding gown and another designers work, but I really wanted them to stop raving about it and start asking her why she did something so ridiculously expected.


    Well, Jerell's collection definitely reflect Jerell's style, but I'm not sure if that's good or bad. His designs are heavily inspired by a mixing of textures. The main problem I have with the clothes are how heavy they look. And the textures do not look good to me! I really like Jerell, but I feel like his collection is heavily Madonna's Like A Virgin inspired which pretty much makes me VIMMAL.

    Man, I can't stand Jerell's wedding gown. Or Funeral Gown, is more appropriate since nothing says Wedding Gown like dirty gray tulle and heavy dark beading. I really don't think his bridesmaid dress is horrible, but I'm not a fan of the flower-sprouting-out-of-your-baby-feed-bags look. Unfortunately, the judges weren't big fans either and poor Jerell will not be accompanying the ladies to Bryant Park (at least for the main competition!)

    But look who else apparently was at Bryant Park?! (Joe & Suede)

    According to the photos on Bravotv.com, both Joe and Suede's collections, well, kind of suck. Any body else feel a little weird about how designers who were Auf'd get to show at Bryant Park anyway? I thought that was like the big goal? {shrug}

    My favorite judges quote this week was far too long to be a post title:
    "...But these wings over her boobs, plus then the jeweled boobs, plus then the jewels under the boobs, and then, of course, she's got a flower pot growing out of her head." ~ Michael Kors

    More great quotes to come, I'm sure, during tonight's episode at 9 pm PST on Bravo!


    Danielle said...

    Oh...I'm from SITS...LOVE Project Runway...thanks for the spoiler...I can't wait to watch tonight!

    Meaghan said...

    Great blog I am now gonna be a follower :)